RITA BEATER MAID

Let me begin by asking - do you remember the great aussie soap prisoner cell block h if no.... you are an idiot.

Prisoner is a show i grew up watching, sure it featured some trully awful acting and it's considered silly and unrealistic but to me it's a show with heart, no other show has made me laugh or cry like prisoner.

So when the oppurtunity to meet Glenda Linscott aka Rita the Beater came up i jumped at the chance, the meeting took place in a small bar which i shall call Mels having already met another prisoner star there i expected the same kind of evening - a desperate star trying to sell crud and really wishing they weren't there however Glenda was none of the above, she was down to earth and was very happy to meet and greet her fans ....all 8 of them (snigger)

As usual i dragged my friend Luke who had just seen her in prisoner the week before. We sat waiting for her to come over, at this point we were quite nervous i was nervous because i didn't know what to say and Luke was nervous because he wasn't much of a fan and therefore had nothing to say. The moment arrived we introduced ourselves and i broke the ice by saying that she hadn't aged a bit... i wasn't being sarcastic she looked the same as she did in prisoner as if she had time travled from the 80s. She seemed very interested in us who we were how we liked the show, i was wearing a check shirt, she asked if it was my prisoner shirt -( a memory i will cherish forever ) she also gave Luke buissness advice which was very srange and surreal.

I also asked her if there was any chance of Prisoner the movie or a remake and she said that she has been approached and maybe just maybe there will be a new prisoner cell block h - yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh:):)

In conclusion it was a good night, it was cool to met someone who was happy with there fame and liked to talk about it all i can say is ...bring on the freak :)

I was so thrilled i wrote this song :)

Lovely Rita beater maid
Lovely Rita beater maid

Lovely Rita beater maid,
Nothing could ever beat you .
When it gets dark I have to run away.

Standing by a parking meter,
When I caught a glimpse of Rita,
beating up a prisoner using her left hook
In a bandana she looked much older,
And the bag across her shoulder
Made her look a little like a biker man.

Lovely Rita beater maid,
May I inquire discreetly,
When are you free to watch some prisoner with me? (Rita!)


Met her out to see what she thinks
Had a laugh and over drinks
Told her I would never like to see her again.
Got the bill and i paid it.
Then sat down I never made it,
Sitting on the sofa with a gay or two.

Oh, lovely Rita beater maid,
Where would I be without you?
Give us money back and make me think of you.
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Rita